Jump THIS shark, X-MEN!
So I went and saw X-Men this past weekend. I have an unusual way of grading movies, so let me explain it really quick. Imagine a cross, along the X axis is the "fun" and "not fun", ranging from -10(not fun), to 10(fun). Along the Y axis is "good", and "not good" with the same scale. Take Schindlers List, very good, but no fun. Starship Troopers is really fun, but no good.
That explained, I give X3 a resounding 0. While it was fun, +6, it was a pretty bad movie in general, -6. There were so many plot holes it was scary. Unless a character had been developed in a previous movie, or you read the X-Men books, you didn't know a thing about them. For example, Beast shows up and plays a major part of the movie, but they tell you pretty much nothing about him. They imply that he used to live at the mansion when he stops by, and then later he's trying to fit into his old uniform, so he must have been an X-Man at some point. But if they're going for the "Well, comic fan's would know that he was one of the original X-Men", then what Iceman and Angel, weren't they original X-Men as well? And in the previous movies weren't Storm, Cyclops, and Marvel Girl the original X-Men?
It seemed to me that they just took a bunch of cool scenes from all the comics and stitched them together in the best order they could. And yes, there are some really cool scenes in this, but a bunch of scenes do not make a movie. Movies have plot and narrative, this does not.
To sum up, X3: The Last Stand jumps the shark in a big way. If you do go and see it, make sure you stay all the way through the credits for special bonus shark jumping scene at the end. But if you want to spend 8 bucks on some good X-Men, put it towards an Astonishing X-Men trade and wait for the DVD. Oh, and if you come into the store, I will deny having seen it.
-Dan
That explained, I give X3 a resounding 0. While it was fun, +6, it was a pretty bad movie in general, -6. There were so many plot holes it was scary. Unless a character had been developed in a previous movie, or you read the X-Men books, you didn't know a thing about them. For example, Beast shows up and plays a major part of the movie, but they tell you pretty much nothing about him. They imply that he used to live at the mansion when he stops by, and then later he's trying to fit into his old uniform, so he must have been an X-Man at some point. But if they're going for the "Well, comic fan's would know that he was one of the original X-Men", then what Iceman and Angel, weren't they original X-Men as well? And in the previous movies weren't Storm, Cyclops, and Marvel Girl the original X-Men?
It seemed to me that they just took a bunch of cool scenes from all the comics and stitched them together in the best order they could. And yes, there are some really cool scenes in this, but a bunch of scenes do not make a movie. Movies have plot and narrative, this does not.
To sum up, X3: The Last Stand jumps the shark in a big way. If you do go and see it, make sure you stay all the way through the credits for special bonus shark jumping scene at the end. But if you want to spend 8 bucks on some good X-Men, put it towards an Astonishing X-Men trade and wait for the DVD. Oh, and if you come into the store, I will deny having seen it.
-Dan
posted by Star Clipper at Friday, June 02, 2006
3 Comments:
I'd have to agree with you Dan...I went to the midnight show and well was about ready to sleep. What I hated the most tho was the obvious "I'm being pulled by a wire" filmography. The story line was alright, but they didn't DO anything with anyone. I read the novelization first, and was pleased with it. And in it, Rogue DOESN'T get the "cure" which is much better. And why was Ororo limited to one new fancy spin move? And in the book, Wolverine got much more stripped by D.P. awesome ability to tear the crap outta things...that I would have liked to have seen ;). The saving grace was popcorn.
I didn't like the movie either. I've never been a big fan of the X-men comics (I'm just not that into the whole "Hero" thing) but the first two movies rocked my socks off right thru my shoes.
SPOILER WARNING!
The biggest problem I had with X3 was the resolution. I know I should expect it from Hollywood, but I had a real problem with the whole "Powerful women must be destroyed in a sexually/physically violent way, by the men who love them for their own good and to protect the world" theme of the ending.
Baloney. To go along with the swiss cheese plot. What a waste of my hard-earned comic book money. I won't do that again.
Yeppers, SK8 that's exactly it. They robbed Jean of her second and more powerful death (but the comics did that by by resurrecting her moldy corpse one too many times any way), but they pretty much robbed the whole Phoenix arc of any poignancy at all (at they at least got the magnitude of her power right, even if they made it domestic rather than cosmic) Still I had fun in my seat, and embraced the hamfisted superhero-ness which is honestly more true to the colors of most of the comics anyway, if a little disappointing.
Just as a sidenote, why was Warren Worthington so broody broody? I like my Angel whipping through the sky with abandon, not dripping tears on the landbound.
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